Thornbury Skittles League Presentation Evening

There being no volunteers to collect the Fred Eldridge Memorial Cup, I was press ganged into going by no lesser person than Debbie Fowler. Despite my protestations that I really didn't want to go, and why should I when there was no money at stake, and I only had £3 on me ( for a pint in the Wheatsheaf after the Skittles AGM), Debbie paid the £8 on my behalf and presented me with my ticket with cheese written on it.

I therefore dutifully turned up at the presentation do, only to find that Bob Gazzard had turned up on his own as well, and we therefore shared a couple of pints each and a table for six. This was a cause of great merryment for the skittles chairman who proceeeded to take the "piss" every time he passed by !!

No matter, the proceedings belatedly got under way with an introduction by the said silver haired (and slightly stooped) chairman, aided and abetted by that well known comedy duo The Bromages. After much self congratulation, this unlikely trio handed out cups and cheques to winners, runner-ups and third place also rans.

There was a gasp of surprise when nobody came forward to receive the Wooden Spoon award, likewise the non-appearance of the Skuttlers and the Wot-U-Wots to collect their prizes for whatever they won ( most people had nodded off by the time they eventually turned up fashionably late like the Thursday Thirsties all season!).

Anyway, the moment arrived when the Golfing Society award was read out ( accompanied by spiteful and slanderous statements from the wizened old chairman ) as I strode across the dance floor to accept the Cup from The Bromages.

However, as I was taking the cup I suddenly became aware of a doleful muttering and ringing of hands.............there had been an error, the engraver had put the wrong name on the cup, and could they have it back so as to get it put right !

And the name they had carved on was "ESSILOR" !!!!

At least it wasn't the First Timers!

I left before the cheese rolls !!

Capt. Pinder

PS. I paid Debbie her £8 on the night....................what a night !!